Ep 24: How to Deal With Fear and Other Crippling Thoughts #TakeCourage

It’s nothing new for me. But this time really took me off guard. When I start to work on something new or big, I’ve learned to expect some of the “usual suspects” (those negative thoughts that are always nearby when we discover we’ve been holding ourselves back) will always crash the party.

Here’s what happened…

I hope you are off to a good start with your goals for the new year.

I also hope your goal is to take on something slightly larger than you did in 2017. Because, frankly, if your goals are a repeat of what you’ve already done last year, how is that making your business any better? Or your life any better? Or your world any better? We are programmed as people to want to move forward.

I want to take a moment and be especially transparent. Let me know if something like this has ever happened to you. 

Yesterday, New Years Day, I sat down to work with my goals and plans in place. Nothing left to chance, I was ready to work.

This year, I approached my goals in a very strategic way. Based on everything I’ve learned from high-achievers and from working with amazing women, I clearly defined my goals and even had a clear roadmap on how I was going to achieve these goals.

So, maybe, because I had all this in place, the really negative self-talk took me by surprise. 

Then, as I was siting there, I was overcome by these thoughts: Am I pursuing something too big? Am I good enough to take this on? Am I worthy of such a big goal?

I’ve come to “expect” these thoughts. It’s a pattern I’ve observed in my own life, when I’m about to start doing/building/pursuing something big and new, these thoughts come knocking. They’re my own personal Glass Walls.

Now, one side of my brain KNEW that those thoughts are what I call “usual suspects” and they are what create the building blocks of Glass Walls. I knew these terrifying thoughts were just that. Thoughts. They were internal. And didn’t necessary have anything to do with reality.

Sometimes we can think “where did these thoughts come from?” 

I have a pretty good idea: OK, we think 60,000 thoughts a day. 95% we think every day. And 40% relate to habits. So, these thoughts are coming up from that other 55% of our thoughts – that if we come up against something like this, a full on assault of our thoughts, and we’re looking for a simple majority, those 55% would win.

And it was like those thoughts banded together for a full-on assault.

But yesterday, I needed more than just the head knowledge of what was going on. That didn’t tame the ferocity. 

Then, a thought crossed my mind that I’ve held close in previous years but hadn’t thought about for quite some time.

Take courage.

It almost has an old-timey ring to it, right? 

It makes me think of Braveheart or some other epic story of taking something on that means so much to them.

What captures my imagination about this phrase is the verb. Take. Not “have.” Or “be given” Or “begrudgingly accept” Or “inherit” 

TAKE.

Take: “reach for and hold” (these are Google’s definitions)

Courage: “the ability to do something that frightens one” Latin origin: heart

I feel like there’s a lot of baggage around the word “take.” That baggage doesn’t belong here with this context…

What this phrase is saying is we all have courage. It’s ours. We all have courage. So, when we take it, we’re taking hold of what’s ours. We’re not taking from others. We are not making others weak by taking courage. In fact, we’re providing an example and even the space for others to take their courage as well. So, no baggage.

I have this little exercise I used to do and when I remembered it yesterday, I did it again (SO powerful!)…

This may sound a bit woo-woo, but I’ll share in a moment why it’s not. Here’s what I did… I closed my eyes and imagined seeing a bright ball of courage right in front of me. Then I imagined reaching out and taking hold of it. Taking hold of my own personal courage. Something about that picture, and feeling like I was holding courage that was always there but felt out of reach, clarified a few things for me. Courage is simple. Perhaps it’s not easy. But it’s simple. It’s right there. We only need to take it.

Now, back to that woo-woo comment. Here’s why I don’t think this is an airy-fairy, woo-woo and frivolous exercise. If an exercise that can help elevate your thoughts and take hold of courage is woo-woo, then the thoughts that made you sink down in fear are also woo-woo. If it’s woo-woo going up, then it was woo-woo to bring you down. 😉

So, if you’re working on your new years goals and you face similar thoughts, I want you to know a couple things:

1. You’re not alone! Though our specific negative thoughts may be different, we all face them.
2. Don’t accept a simple majority of your thoughts. Remember those 55% of our daily thoughts note above? That’s what I mean. Don’t feel like you need to accept all your thoughts as truth. 
3. It is completely possible to UnSabotage your thoughts to get past barriers that might have seemed insurmountable before! 100% possible.
4. You have greatness written all over you. Don’t settle in 2018. Reach out and grab that courage that’s sitting right there and get moving.

If you want to talk about how you can UnSabotage your daily thoughts so you can not only get out of your way but also step into your greatness, I’d love to hear from you. Hop on over to UnSabotage.com/letstalk.

Let’s schedule a call! And my promise to you with this call is you will hang up knowing your best next move in shattering your own Glass Walls!